The Pros and Cons of Dating at Work

By

Love or infatuation can blossom anywhere, even in the last place you would think to look for it. I am talking about the workplace. Even if you don't plan it, love or a flirtation, can happen at work just as often as it can happen at play. The ironic thing is you can really see a person's values and standards when they are at work. You can see in a few days or weeks another person's true personality. We spend 8 hours a day with our co-workers. We see how they deal with dead lines, with frustration and satisfaction. It sounds like work may be a great place to meet a life partner. But is it?

The answer is of course- NO. Work is not a good place to have a romance. There are lots of people who have nothing better to do than watch the people they work with. There are the dreaded rumor mills in many work places and you do not want your romance raked through the coals there do you? Work and pleasure are two different things, and they usually do not mix well, kind of like oil and water. But, what if you meet this great guy or gal there, and want to date them?

Think about it. You know him or her very well. You do spend many hours a day with your co-worker. What about the first time he sends you flowers?. Everyone will want to read his card. It will be a new and hot topic for the rest of your co-workers. Not only do you have to think carefully about the office staff, you also have to consider management. Some companies frown upon interoffice relationships. Some just do not allow it. So before you run off with your co-worker on a date be sure you know your company policy on co-workers dating. I am sure neither of you want to be fired.

The reason many companies, and fellow workers, do not like it when co-workers date are reasonable. When two people are in love, and having a romance, their decision making process could be affected. They may not be able to be professional where each other is concerned. If your lover is your boss, it could affect the raise he may give you. Or it could affect assignments you get. Making life for the other office staff unbearable.

Another reason is that for couples who work together there can be professional jealousy. What if you get a promotion your partner thinks he deserved? What if he gets the job you wanted? Our ego's can be very fragile, and when confronted on a personal and a professional level, it could prove to be too much.

Some companies have reassignment policies. Your company may want to reassign one of you to another department. Or just reassign some of your/his work so that confidential and important decisions cannot be made because of favoritism. This, if one of you isn't happy about a move, could affect the personal side of your relationship. It's really important that you both look at what your career goals are, and truly access if you are emotionally able to handle this type of potential conflict.

Is it really good for a couple to spend so much time together? It does work. We all know couples who are constantly together, and work very well, on a professional and a personal level with each other. Are you and your co-worker that type of person? Do you like some time where you are identified for yourself, not as part of a two-some? If you and your partner have a fight, will it affect the other co-workers in your office?

If you are dating, and then break up, will you be able to work with that person all day, everyday? There are both positive and negative points to a romance at work. It may be the right thing for you, but do give it some thought before you jump in all goo-goo eyed.

If you do decide to date your co-worker, make sure initially, you are discreet about it. Very discreet. This way there is no need to worry about the gossip, or just the embarrassment if it doesn't work out. You do not need extra pressure from outside influences. Dating is not meant to be a group effort. Leave your other co-workers out of it. Be professional, that means leaving the romance at home when your at work. Keep your private life private.


 
©2005 LoveAtADistance.com Love At A Distance Home